Yeah, yeah, I know I'm late. Here were are a few days into October and where have I been? Truth to tell, I won a trip to Aruba on Wheel of Fortune and I was there, on vacation, sipping on Bloody Mary's (course) and letting my pasty white diseased skin take in some rays. But I was summoned back by someone and, well you know me, I don't like to name names. Okay, it was fucking Greg at Cinema Styles. And if you didn't know already, he's have quite the time over at his blog this month so you should check it out.
So here I am. And Lord knows this shitty film blog could use some of my help.
So let's talk Zombies.
A lot of people ask Evil Clown "Evil Clown, why do you like zombies so much?" And I usually respond with my stock "Fuck you, I will eat your soul."
But it's true, I love zombies. Because really, is there anything scarier, or more funny than a zombie? On one hand, you've got the fact that they represent an out of control virus that turns you into a scary-looking, rabid animal that doesn't have the good nature to make sure you're dead first before it feasts on your innards. And then on the other hand, you've got the fact that zombies are probably the lowest monster on the food chain. They are the cockroach of monsters for the simple fact that there are so damn many of them. You kill one and there are million to fill its place. So it's kind of hard to take them that seriously because there is no value in any one zombie.
Evil Clown has been hearing a few things lately regarding zombies and frankly he's been a little disturbed by what he's heard. There are some that say that maybe zombies have run their course. That with all the movies and books and graphic novels and video games that there's a zombie overload. And I'm here to say that like a cockroach, these bastards are here to stay. You can write and say what you want, and be done with zombies all you want, but these rotted undead corpses are forever. Why? Because zombies are the equivalent of loosening the belt a little and letting our collective hair down. Zombies are a great big golden ticket to going a little crazy. Past zombie movies have touched on this idea, but none have to the extent of the recent Zombieland. The main character Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) attempts to justify his survival by following a set of strict rules he has given himself. But in doing so, he further hits home the fact that when zombies are on the loose, the normal rules do not apply. In fact, no rules apply. There's a great scene where the characters are perusing a road-side shop. They are being careful not to touch anything because proper etiquette tells them not to. A single piece is broken accidentally. Then another one deliberately. And then complete mayhem follows with store being completely demolished. It was fun as hell to watch and for some reason it felt like new territory.
The zombie Apocalypse is hell, but that's really looking at things from the glass half empty point of view, isn't it.? The upside is, with the zombie Apocalypse there are no stupid rules to follow. No pillows to fluff. No dress codes. No lines. No facebook. No stupid movie blogs. That's a very liberating realization. And that my friends is why zombies will be forever. Ever. Ever. Ever. Ever (I'm attempting some kind of echo effect here if you didn't notice).