Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Hi James, thanks for having me over.

Of course, welcome to my home. I like to call it Jonestown.

I'm sorry... what did you say?


You said... Jonestown.

What? No I didn't. I said Jamestown.

Anyway. Thanks for having me.

No problem. I'm a big fan of your writing.

Really? I mean, I haven't been too kind to you on Lazy Eye Theatre.

Honesty, Piper. That's what I crave. Honesty. I pluck it from the tree, squeeze it in to a cup and drink it up. Can't get enough of it.

Well I'm glad. Since we're being honest, I have to tell you that I can't believe that you were nominated for a Writer's Guild Award. I mean, technically, you're incredible but you're writing is kind of for shit.

There's that honesty I love so much. Oh Piper, I could just hug you really, really, really tightly and maybe kick you a couple of times.



You said kick.


And Avatar is a really fun movie, but Oscar bait? Come on. What kind of joke is that, right?

You look thirsty.

I do?

Yes you do. How about some Kool-Aid?

Kool-Aid? Actually, I could just use some water.

It's settled. Kool-Aid it is.

Um, look. It's been good to see you. Nice catching up. Please give Suzy a hug and a kiss for me.

You're not going anywhere.

I'm not?

Not until you have a drink of my sweet, sweet Grape Kool-Aid. Everyone's drinking it.

Yes, I know they are.


Greg said...

Interesting post. I'm at Cameron's house right now visiting, typing on his laptop while he gets me something to drink. Here he comes now. Anyway, just quickly wanted to say I agree. Cameron's writing is total (glug, glug, glug)...

[wipes mouth and makes "ah" sound]

Where was I? Oh yes, Cameron's a genius and... I'm sorry, what James? Oh yes. And he's my personal god.

PIPER said...

Of all the people, Greg. But I know how you love a good heaping glass of Kool-Aid.

And while you're there, check out Cameron's basement. He actually has a full-size Terminator that you can program to kill somebody. Don't try to make him kill Cameron, though. That doesn't work.