Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Movie Confessions


I like the pointy ears of a hobbit, but the pointy ears of Spock bug me.

I often criticize others for liking a certain movie even if I have never seen it.



I love strong female characters almost as much as I love Kate Beckinsale in a tight and shiny werewolf killing suit.

I hate Michael Bay with the passion of 10 angry gods, but if The Rock were on TV I would probably watch it.

I often criticize remakes, yet some of my favorite movies are The Thing (1982), Ocean's 11 (2001), The Fly (1986) and Cape Fear (1991).

I prefer Blow Out to Blow Up knowing full well that there wouldn't be the former without the latter.

I usually watch foreign films dubbed in English.

Chances are very good that I will choose a movie I've seen 10 times over a movie I've never seen.



I might argue that Young Frankenstein is the best comedy ever made, never having completely seen a Charlie Chaplin, W.C. Fields or Harold Lloyd film.

I own both of the Matrix sequels on DVD.

And finally, my movie food of choice is Sweettarts and a large Diet Coke.



This feels like a Meme, but it's not. But if you want to treat it as such, consider yourself tagged.

30 comments:

Jason Bellamy said...

This is brilliant. In some way I identify with almost all of them ... except the one about watching foreign films dubbed in English. I've never done that or even considered it.

(Though I have played with the languages on the Field of Dreams DVD to hear The Voice in French, which is terrific fun.)

PIPER said...

Thanks Jason.

Yeah, I'm more apt to do the old switcheroo on foreign films. It's ugly, but I'm lazy.

Honestly, I find myself spending too much time reading subtitles and not enough time reading people.

Reel Whore said...

"I often criticize others for liking a certain movie even if I have never seen it."

I'm guilty of that myself.

"I love Kate Beckinsale in a tight and shiny werewolf killing suit."

Who doesn't?!

I used to criticize remakes, but I have given in to the laziness that is Hollywood. Doesn't mean I won't talk smack, but I'm too tired to fight anymore.

Yes, but do you own the Animatrix? I hate that I was once such a completist.

Ed Howard said...

This is great, but the English dub thing is pretty much cinephile blasphemy.

I prefer Blow Out to Blow Up knowing full well that there wouldn't be the former without the latter....

No shame in that one, though: movies are always influencing other movies, and no film exists in a vacuum. So if you like a certain film better than the film(s) that inspired it, what does it really matter?

Greg said...

Chances are very good that I will choose a movie I've seen 10 times over a movie I've never seen.
...

That's pretty much true for everyone I think. It's all about comfort.

Ed Howard said...

I don't know, I can't think of more than a very small handful of films I've ever watched that many times. I'd much rather see something new than revisit a film I've already seen, no matter how much I love it.

PIPER said...

Reel Whore,

Yes I own the Animatrix and I love it. And yes, I'm guilty of being a completist.

I have never revisited either of those sequels. I might one day with my son. He may love them. But I really hate myself for owning them.

Ed,

Did you read my response to Jason about the English dubbing?

"I find myself spending too much time reading subtitles and not enough time reading people."

That shit is inspired.

PIPER said...

Greg,

It probably is true for everyone (except Ed), but I'm really bad at it.

Like I will be 30 minutes into a new film and think "I could turn this off and pop in an old favorite instead."

That's bad.

Ed Howard said...

Did you read my response to Jason about the English dubbing?

"I find myself spending too much time reading subtitles and not enough time reading people."

That shit is inspired.
...

That's a good excuse, I'll admit. ;)

PIPER said...

Ed,

I'm not guilty of it all the time, but especially when I watch movies on small format (my portable player) I prefer to watch without subtitles.

Moviezzz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Chuck Williamson said...

Those are some pretty scary skeletons hiding in your closet! I won't repeat some of the offenses, as I think others have expressed the shock and horror quite well. But, hell, I doubt any of us can cast the first stone. We all have cine-horrors to hide.

(For example: I think Speed Racer was one of the best films of last year. And I say that without irony.)

Burbanked said...

Great post, Piper. And I miserably share many of these - I'll often prefer to watch something old I've seen a dozen times instead of something new.

I've mentioned this before, probably, but I nearly always watch THE ROCK and even ARMAGEDDON. I feel like a beaten dog because I keep thinking that Michael Bay movies will treat me better the next time and they never, ever do.

You wanna talk confessions? Not only do I own the MATRIX trilogy, I like them!I love the ANIMATRIX as well, but have never bought it. Someday. Maybe.

Paul Arrand Rodgers said...

I own both Matrix sequels and The Animatrix.

I saw all three of the above before seeing the original film.

PIPER said...

Moviezzz,

I almost dropped your name again in the comments. When's the last time you rewatched a movie?

Chuck,

Speed Racer? What the FUCK!!!! Jesus, you disgust me.

Nah. I know that even Ed hides some deep and dark sins that one day he'll confess to me. And then we'll share a laugh and a Little Debbie Snack Cake.

Burbanked,

Armageddon? You hate Bay more than me. Damn, that's tough. But I feel your pain.

I can't say I hate the Matrix Trilogy. Okay, maybe I can. I don't really hate the second one, but the third one gets pretty bad at the end.

Paul,

That's a wacked way to introduce yourself to a franchise.

And I do love the Animatrix.

Ed Howard said...

I'm confessing all my dirty secrets over at Bill's place. I can't spread this stuff around too much.

PIPER said...

Ed,

I hear ya. Bill said "hi" to me one day and an hour later I told him everything. I mean EVERYTHING! All he did was say "hi." I think it's his kind eyes.

Megan said...

I'll probably treat it as a meme at some point.

Moviezzz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PIPER said...

Megan,

Meme away.

Moviezzz,

You have incredible power over yourself. I admire you for that.

Imagine all the movies I could have seen if I hadn't been such a puss and rewatched an old favorite.

Kramer said...

"I love strong female characters almost as much as I love Kate Beckinsale in a tight and shiny werewolf killing suit."

Is this closet movie confession material? Personally I think if you don't like Kate in a werewolf killing suit you're probably brain dead. Or a werewolf.

PIPER said...

It's a confession. That's all it is.

I didn't necessarily say it was all juicy.

Fletch said...

I often criticize others for liking a certain movie even if I have never seen it.

Guilty.

I hate Michael Bay with the passion of 10 angry gods, but if The Rock were on TV I would probably watch it.

Guilty.


Chances are very good that I will choose a movie I've seen 10 times over a movie I've never seen.

Guilty.


Yes, Piper, you are going to hell for the English dubbing thing. I hate when I lend a foreign flick to a friend and they come back and tell me they watched it dubbed. It makes me wish I had never lent it to them.

I'm curious, Paul (if you're reading this) - do you prefer whichever Matrix film you saw first most? It seems as though first almost always is best loved, whatever the case may be.

Reel Whore said...

I'm curious, too Paul. I'd love to know which Matrix was your favorite given the watch order.

Seth said...

Hey Piper-

If your goal was to embarrass yourself, you had me a couple days ago at Twister.

sp

PIPER said...

Fletch and Reel Whore,

Wait. Who the hell does this blog belong to? Me, that's who.

Quit asking Paul questions.

Seth,

Yeah, I seem to be in a self depreciating mode. And I'm glad you can swoop in and beat me down, you little bitch.

Fletch said...

Hey Reel Whore,

What do you think is wrong with Piper? I think he didn't eat his Wheaties this morning.

PIPER said...

There were no Wheaties this morning. I wanted to eat them. I looked and looked and looked and nothing. Nowhere. I thought there was a box, but it was just Saltines. I don't want Saltines for breakfast.

Screw the Wheaties. Screw EVERYONE!

Reel Whore said...

Whew! I'm glad I never got hooked on Wheaties!

I've always been a Frosted Flakes man. You should give them a try Piper. They're Great!

PIPER said...

My motto has always been: Go Captain Crunch with Crunchberries, or go home.

That's quickly followed with Go Fruity Pebbles or go home.

Of course I don't eat those because they offer nothing of significance other than another ripple in my ass, but I still dream about eating them.

Yep, I'm pathetic.