Hi James, thanks for having me over.

Of course, welcome to my home. I like to call it Jonestown.

I'm sorry... what did you say?

What?

You said... Jonestown.

What? No I didn't. I said Jamestown.

Anyway. Thanks for having me.

No problem. I'm a big fan of your writing.

Really? I mean, I haven't been too kind to you on Lazy Eye Theatre.

Honesty, Piper. That's what I crave. Honesty. I pluck it from the tree, squeeze it in to a cup and drink it up. Can't get enough of it.

Well I'm glad. Since we're being honest, I have to tell you that I can't believe that you were nominated for a Writer's Guild Award. I mean, technically, you're incredible but you're writing is kind of for shit.

There's that honesty I love so much. Oh Piper, I could just hug you really, really, really tightly and maybe kick you a couple of times.

Kick?

What?

You said kick.

Who?

And Avatar is a really fun movie, but Oscar bait? Come on. What kind of joke is that, right?

You look thirsty.

I do?

Yes you do. How about some Kool-Aid?

Kool-Aid? Actually, I could just use some water.

It's settled. Kool-Aid it is.

Um, look. It's been good to see you. Nice catching up. Please give Suzy a hug and a kiss for me.

You're not going anywhere.

I'm not?

Not until you have a drink of my sweet, sweet Grape Kool-Aid. Everyone's drinking it.

Yes, I know they are.