Monday, May 5, 2008

Friends Don't Let Friends Dance The Dance Of The Angry

This entry is for the Invitation To The Dance Blog-a-Thon going on over at Ferdy On Films. Won't you join in the fun?

When movie characters break out in dance, it's usually out of joy. By definition, dance means to leap or skip about excitedly. They get caught up in emotion and break into song and then the toes start tapping. It's a bit awkward really when you think about it, but there probably is no greater show of elation than the dance.


And then there are the trailblazers, Those who dance not on behalf of happiness, but on behalf of anger. These people use the dance as some sort of punching bag to get out their aggressions. Had a hard day at the office? "Honey, don't bother me for the next 30 minutes, I'm going to be in the basement dancing angry." And that trailblazer is none other than Ren McCormack (Kevin Bacon) the straight up fox from Footloose. As awkward as spontaneous joyful dance might be, angry dance is even more so. Honestly, I would have rather watched Kevin Bacon set fire to a small village than to watch his feet pound in synch with a bad 80's keyboard. But that's what happens when you love dance this much. You dance for joy and you dance so you don't punch somebody square in the face.



Damn I'm pissed. I have to work out some teen angst here. If I don't get un-pissed I might do something drastic. Like dance.

Stupid Preacher. He's got a hot daughter, but he makes me mad because he says I can't dance. But I'll show him...

How do you like those moves Mr. Preacher Man? I'm dancing. But not dancing for joy. I'm Angry Dancing.


Hey hot daughter of Mr. Preacher Man. You're hot and I can have you so I'm not sure why you make me mad, but I'm angry dancing so chances are even stuff that makes me feel good will piss me off. So I'll show you...

How about a twist. And a hop and a skip. And I'm so pissed I might sway. Oh, there I go. I'm swaying. That's how angry I am. I'm swaying.


Stupid Mr. Cop Man. Mr. Pig! You think you know me because I'm a teenager and you know all teenagers, but you don't know me, man. I'm an Angry Dancer and don't make me mad because I might just do a little Jitter Bug right her in front of you. In the meantime, let me show you a couple of moves...


How do you like this? I'm so angry I'm dancing up against backlit silo walls. That's how angry you've made me. Remember, you made me do this Mr. Cop Man.

Stupid Druggie Teenager. You think drugs make me feel good? No way. Dancing makes me feel good. But not when I'm mad. When I'm mad I Angry Dance and you don't want to be around when that happens. But you've made me mad with your drug ways and... uh oh now look what's gonna happen...


I'm going to skip in front of backlit silo walls. There's corn and seed and shit floating around and I'm dancing around with it because that's how angry you've made me. You wanted to make me feel good Mr. Dope Man, but instead you've angered my inner dancing beast and now it just wants to hop and skip about.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you have defined a new genre - the Angry Young Dancer!

Burbanked said...

I...I'm just...well...my god.

I just don't even know how to react to this. Speechless, with milk and Fruit Loops spraying from my nose. Ouch.

PIPER said...

Holy shit that's weird. I was seriously 30 seconds away from e-mailing you the post because I was hoping that you might enjoy it.

Burbanked said...

Myself, I'm not a dancer, so I couldn't exactly say how much steam one could burn off by doing so. I'm much more of a dying on the inside type, but that's another story.

But I just never felt as though this scene in FOOTLOOSE was, I don't know, cathartic in the least. From Bacon's overly petulant cigarette smoking business throughout the - if I may - backlit silo wall skipping - the entire sequence just struck me as truly ridiculous, and not in a campy, so-bad-it's-good way.

Ah, shit. I'm sitting here critiquing FOOTLOOSE with you. Hello, oblivion!

Burbanked said...

<----- Oooh, but here's my comment, right alongside the Unsuspecting Beard Cap. Sublime!

Bob Turnbull said...

It's ironic that you see his dancing as being angry Piper...

"I say, we can dance, we can dance
Everything out of control
We can dance, we can dance
We're doing it from wall to wall"

"We can dance if we want to
We've got all your life and mine
As long as we abuse it, never gonna lose it
Everything'll work out right"

"And you can act real rude and totally removed
And I can act like an imbecile"

That's right Piper...Kevin Bacon was really dancing The Safety Dance.

PIPER said...

bob,

I love that my post inspired you to rewrite the lyrics to Safety Dance.

This is a very proud moment.

Bob Turnbull said...

Well, temper that pride a bit there Piper...No rewrites of lyrics here. Thems actually the words from the song. The paragraphs are a bit out of order, but otherwise those are the words that Ivan sang for us in those heady days of the early 80s.

You did inspire me to do a Google Search though, so that's gotta count for something...

PIPER said...

Sorry,

Didn't mean to literally rewrite. Just to write them down.

Love Men Without Hats.

Tony Tanti said...

Awesome post! This is hilarious stuff.

Anonymous said...

Pat Piper does it again! Side-ripping stuff- and is it just me or does the preacher man in Screen capture #2 look dangerously like George Bush Jr.? It must be the blurs!

PIPER said...

Thanks Gautam,

You're right about the preacher man. Who knew Footloose was so ahead of its time?

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