Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Top 5 Tuesdays (T5T) Holidays That Would Make For Great Horror


Holidays used to be days filled with joy. A chance to take off work and celebrate National "Whatever" Day with friends and family around the National "Whatever" Day Bush or Wreath. But thanks, or no thanks, to horror movies, those magical days are gone. Beware the holiday for it's just another excuse for some wacko to go on a murderous rampage for some strange thing that happened to him on that holiday when he was a kid.

One would think with movies like Halloween, My Bloody Valentine, Black Christmas and April Fool's Day that all the good holidays have been taken. Not so. There are still plenty of good holidays left. So let's hear them. Give me your Top 5 Holidays that would make for a great horror movie. Here are mine in no particular order.

1. International Earth Day, March 20th Some guy drives a Hummer around town and throws styrofoam and baby diapers everywhere, polluting the air and land, making for a long and painful death for everyone.

2. Hammock Day, July 22 An angry consumer who could never figure out how to sit in one of those damn things goes around and strangles people to death with... wait for it... a hammock.

3. Poinsettia Day, December 12th A seemingly sweet Grandmother kills hundreds by baking the poisonous flower into holiday treats that she sells at bake sales all over the country.

4. May Day, May 1st A small group of crazies still wondering why this is even a holiday deliver hundreds of empty May baskets to children everywhere, leaving them empty and disappointed.

5. Groundhog's Day, February 2 When the groundhog sees its shadow, this scares the shit out of it and sends it on a murderous rampage, killing everyone in its path.

9 comments:

Fox said...

1. Megan's Birthday
2. Election Day
3. Tax Filing Day
4. Oscar Party Day
5. Take Your Kids To Work Day

Paul Arrand Rodgers said...

I'm shocked that there hasn't been an Election Day horror movie yet.

Megan said...

I can only come up with 3 more at this moment...

1. Fox's Laundry Day
2. Administrative Professionals Day
3. Talk Like a Pirate Day

whitney said...

I just watched Silent Night Deadly Night and it reaffirmed to me how dangerous Christmas really is. Besides black ice on the roads, blizzards, avalanches, etc. there are also killer Santas.

PIPER said...

Fox,

Megan's birthday consists of her inviting a lot of friends over, and then opening a bunch of presents that she gives to herself and all of them are knives and axes and then she thanks everyone for coming and then she kills them.

Megan,

Fox's laundry day consists of everyone in a square mile of his house breaking out in hives and boils and turning into freakish zombies from the stench and killing everyone.

Paul,

Every day leading to election day is a horror movie.

Whitney,

Christmas is classic torture. Being nice to family members you don't want to and smiling big when you get presents you hate. That's sheer torture.

Fox said...

Speaking of Christmas movies, have you guys seen Christmas Evil? It has one of the greatest endings to a crazy movie ever. Be sure to Netflix it for grandma this year!

Paul Arrand Rodgers said...

SANTA'S SLAY

Fred said...

October 24, 2008: United Nations Day. A group of evil world dictators get together and hijack an international organization founded on the principals of world peace, democracy and an end to prejudice. The free world does nothing while the evil world dictators succeed in making the UN Human Rights Commission a tool for spreading hatred towards Jews and the Security Counsel a defensive tool to protect their abusive regimes, all the while stealing from UNICEF and the other UN charitable organizations dedicated to feeding and educating the poor and hungry around the world.

No, sorry. That is just too far fetched. There is no way anyone would believe that could actually happen.

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