Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Speaking of Famousosity

You should know this about me. I'm famous.


I don't have to wear big sunglasses when I go out and pump gas and I don't get asked for autographs or to pose in photos (although I did pose in one photo because these women were on a bachelorette party and they said they needed a photo of Drew Carey on the scavenger hunt and I'm often told I look like Drew Carey) and stuff like that but I know a lot of people. I'm making the air quotation marks here around the word people because if you're talking about someone famous you're not really talking about people... you're talking about people (and again I'm making air quotation marks). And because you know me, you know these people (again with the air quotation marks) because of all that six degrees stuff. Here's a list of people that I have encountered in my life thus far. Just don't go calling on them because they may not remember me.

I met Kim Fields at an ABC All-Stars Olympic kind of thingy in California. She was nice. And sweaty.


Talked with Buck Henry for quite some time about ragtime music in Sedalia, Missouri. He's a big fan.

Used to deliver newspapers to David Doyle's (Bosley) brother. I don't think he took the weekend paper and was an okay tipper when I collected.

Met John Leguizamo when he was in Lincoln shooting To Wong Foo Thanks For Everything Julie Newmar. He was not in drag.


Jodi Foster said "hi" to me as I walked out of a theater at the Telluride Film Festival. Her movie Little Man Tate premiered there. I have loved her ever since.

The rapper Fat Joe said "whasssup" to me as I passed him on the stairs of our hotel in Miami. It was around 3 a.m. and he was blasting the stereo of his car so loud I could hear it in my hotel room. I called down to the front desk to complain.


Shook hands with Bruce Campbell and told him how much of a fan I was of his movies. He asked my named and then told me I was a good man.

Rode down the elevator with Busta Rhymes. He is a very large man.

Stood in line to a movie with Amy Irving. I attempted to have a conversation with her which evidently bugged her and caused her to move to the front of the line. Bitch.

Partied with Kelly Lynch's sister at a Country Bar in LA. She's as hot as Kelly Lynch by the way.


Stood next to Laura Dern and told her how much I enjoyed her in Rambling Rose. She was sweet like a Georgia peach.

While at a blackjack table in Vegas at about 3 a.m., I watched Vince Vaughn flip a cigarette into his mouth and then give me the shooters. I gave him the single shooter back and raised him a wink.


Met Paul Rudd in a bar in LA. We talked Jayhawk basketball.

Although I have never met Stanley Tucci, I have seen him twice at two separate restaurants in New York within one week. I think maybe he was stalking me.

And most recently at the Grindhouse premiere, I was walking over to meet Kurt Russell when I ran in to Quentin Tarantino instead. I told him I loved the films and he thanked me for coming. Never did meet Kurt Russell.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Holy Cow, I know people who know people!

I'm totally impressed by the "shooter" to Vince Vaughn (though I've never heard of it referred to as "shooters." If we're thinking of the same thing, I've always known it as "the wink and the gun"). Did you make the clicking noise as well?!

Burbanked said...

I've posted about this before, but I get so tickled thinking about such memories that they bear repeating (at least in my own mind).

I once wiped down an exercise machine at the Warner Bros. gym for Clint Eastwood. He said "thanks".

I once stood in a men's room in between Tom Hanks and Gary Sinise as they carried on a conversation. I looked forward and only forward.

I once nearly ran over Mel Gibson with my car. Dude was pissed.

And I once passed Gordon Jump on his way out of the Toluca Lake Vons.

There were others, of course, but to be honest it's kind of hard to top Arthur Carlson, isn't it?

PIPER said...

Alan,

I figured you would chime in here. I don't think I want to get into a "star off" with you. I'm sure you've seen your fair share.

Of course Mel Gibson was pissed. He's Mad Max.

My buddy and I almost ran over Danny Bonaduchebag when he was out jogging. I only call him that because I don't know how to spell his last name and don't want to look it up. Vulgarity comes out of laziness.

Pacheco,

It's a funny story really. It was at Mandalay Bay. Vaughn is walking towards my blackjack table and I swear this all happened in slo-mo it was so cool. Vaughn was dressed in Swingers garb. I think he gave me the shooters (no wink just the two guns) because my mouth was agape. I'm pretty star struck and usually don't handle myself very well under these circumstances. I immediately told my buddy that Vaughn had just given me the shooters and he didnt' know who he was (this was a while back). I was so pissed I couldn't share the experience with someone.

Burbanked said...

Stargazing in Hollywood is a tricky thing when you work there because you can't be so uncool that you freak out, even though your fanboy instincts are absolutely telling you to do so.

Following a screening of the great Peter Weir's movie Fearless, I got to lock eyes with the great great Jeff Bridges. We shared what I like to call the "I'm a guy/you're a guy" look - similar to the Vince Vaughn bit but without the hand-pistols.

TALKING MOVIEzzz said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Your people trump my people (air quotes). I did see Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson in a bar in downtown Annapolis, MD once. They were shooting wedding crashers and I suppose they had some time off. They were mobbed by a bunch of people and rolled out quick.

I also Aaron Neville in a new orleans airport waiting for his luggage.

Anonymous said...

¬I've seen quit a few stars in my time- I actually shot a commercial with Clint Eastwood- but have only had the balls to talk to one, Jeff Foxworthy.

It was at a Braves game. I was standing in line for a cold Bud. Behind me was some Drunk guy begging a dude to tell a "you might be a redneck" joke. When I turned around to see the show, Jeff was standing there- I call him Jeff- with his five-year old son looking very uncomfortable. He did ablidge the drunk with a redneck joke under his breath -I believe it was a dirty redneck joke from the way the guy howled- and the drunk staggered off. So I turned to Jeff and say: “I thought I heard someone that sounded like Jeff Foxworthy”. I immediately thought about how stupid I sounded and I should have given him his privacy because it’s obviously what he was going for that day.

I guess that’s why I don’t go out of my way to speak to a celeb, even if I am sitting next to one in the hotel bar - I recently sat next to a very lonely Eddie Griffin who ordered bottle after bottle of mini champagne as he talked on his cell phone - hopefully to someone else.

PIPER said...

Now if we're talking sightings. That ups the list a bit.

Sushi Roku in Beverly Hills seems to be the place and I think it's cliched that movie stars actually hang in Beverly Hills where everyone expects them to hang.

In one night I saw Beck, Carmen Electra and sat next to the older brother on The Wonder Years. He is now a wrestling agent.

Then another night at Roku I saw Lee Majors (with a girlfriend a third his age) and Venus Flytrap (WKRP reference)

Saw Kari Russell and Peter Berg at separate tables in another sushi joint.

Saw John Travolta and Kelly Preston at Disney World. Travolta is very very short.

And the list goes on.

Burbanked said...

We're just up to our elbows in WKRP sitings; what the hell is going on here?

Anonymous said...

I live in St. Louis. The only stars here are news achorpeople.

Sigh...

Damian Arlyn said...

Aside from Dave Barry and Ben Stein I've never met anybody famous. My sister has met quite a few celebrities though and I'm sure will meet quite a few more before the decade's out.

Adam Ross said...

I had a whole summer of celebrity encounters while working in Sun Valley, Idaho after I graduated from high school. Numerous Schwarzenegger sightings: Once with the whole family in tow (I swear Maria Shriver's calves looked like barrels) and one time he came to my restaurant with a three day beard, wearing flip flops and pajama pants (he left with an ice cream cone in each hand). I also bussed the table of Steven Spielberg and Cate Capshaw (and even held on to Spielberg's sundae spoon for awhile).

My most memorable was probably the time in Ashland, Ore., when I passed a very drunk Paul Allen on the sidewalk one early evening -- he was using a young, leggy blonde as a crutch.

Ross Ruediger said...

I, too, have met Gary Sandy. He was in San Antonio for the tour of BEST LITTLE WHOREHOUSE & I chatted him up at an afterparty. I'm pretty sure my love of all things WKRP unnerved him, as he sort of nodded at me and said, "I can tell you really like the show".

The true test of how many famous people you've met can be measured by how uninteresting they become after awhile sans a script telling them all those clever things to say. I've actually had run-ins with too many to mention, and not once has anyone ever told me how great they think I am.

(Please, feel free to read that and think "What a dick".)

PIPER said...

Ross,

I don't consider what you said Dickish at all. You're absolutely right.

I was relieved that the meeting with Tarantino was so unexpected because I usually say dumb things.

For example, I worked with Neil Tardio Jr. who used to be married to Tea Leone. We were in a cab and there was silence and I said "so, Tea Leone." His response was sincere when he said "she was a sweetheart" and I could tell that he still had feelings for her. But that didn't stop me from saying "yeah, she's hot." I'm an idiot.

Ross Ruediger said...

Heh. That sounds exactly like something I'd say.

I got sidetracked writing my last post here, and I SWEAR to you I'm not making this up, Piper...

The single most congenial, cool, laid back celeb I've ever met[1] was...drumroll please...Drew Carey.

I kid you not. The guy made me feel like I was his best friend. Mostly it was odd because I'm not really a Drew Carey fan at all, and in fact introduced myself by admitting I never even watched his show. He couldn't have cared less and proceeded to talk to me for a good 15 minutes and I found myself being the person having to say, "Hey, I gotta git!"

Yup, Drew rocked.

[1] My ongoing friendship with Jackie Haley notwithstanding.

Anonymous said...

You need to put this list up on 43people.com.

Anonymous said...

My people (air quote) meetings have been few. I was an extra in a little known movie called Carny when I was in 10th grade. I was friends with the daughter of the local assistant casting director. We took Jodi Foster down to the beach at Tybee Island the weekend before shooting started. She was only a year older than we were but she might as well have been 10... I could tell we bored the shit out of her.

Gary Busey ran into me really hard filming a chase scene down the midway and busted my lip. He came by the first aid trailer after they got the shot and signed my bloody tee-shirt and talked to me for a while.

I almost got puked on by Rob Lowe on 6th street in Austin in 1986. It was the night before Farm Aid II concert and he came running out of a bar between my buddy and I and projectile hurled. He is probably one of the few guys at the time that could be clutching a fire hydrant puking his guts up in the gutter and still have a cluster of gorgeous girls around him saying "he's so cute"... prick.

I talked with Ben Stein for a while in a bar at a JavaOne convention.

I sat next to Lauren Hutton on a flight from Houston to LA. My mother had always told that we were related to her somehow... as near as we could figured out, my Great Great Grandfather and her Great Grandfather were brothers. Neither of us knew what the hell kind of cousins that made us.

PIPER said...

Steve,

You were in Carney and hung with Foster? That's a life already. That's pretty sweet.

Anonymous said...

Pat Piper you're my hero. Seriously though, a fairly impressive list of who's who and kinda who's who.

Me personally, I opened a door for "giant chin guy" from Manic Cop and Hell comes to Frogtown after he locked himself outside a hotel door, and I once partied with Bono and PJ Harvey in Chicago at an all night private party downtown after a U2 show... Turns out he is super friendly and also super short. :-)

Sheamus the... said...

woe...cool stuff man. I wish Jodie Foster and Bruce Cambell would have been on my list.

I have Jeff Wadlow in my cell phone(he directed Cry Wolfe)

Tom Shadyac(directed Ace Ventura, Patch Adams, Nutty Professor, Bruce Almighty 1and 2) came and sat in my hotel room and watched me edit a short film.

I saw Tom Wilkinson in LA at Normal premiere.

Saw those that brought us Sean of the Dead, Simon Pegg, Nick Frost, and Edgar Wright at Hot Fuzz screening.

I got the writers of Batman Forever to sign my dvd and got in the LA newspapers for it at Batman Forever screening.

My best friend gave Greg Kinear's nephew a wedgie so hard it ripped his underwear.

i think thats all i got.